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22066 |
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Date: March 26, 2020 at 04:05:43
From: Akira, [DNS_Address]
Subject: Falwell Offers Liberty Students Chance to Meet Jesus by End of Semeste |
URL: Falwell Offers Liberty Students a Chance to Meet Jesus by the End of the Semester |
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"LYNCHBURG, Va. — Following the decision to allow students to remain on
campus during the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic, Liberty University is giving
students a chance to meet Jesus Christ by the end of the semester, the
school announced Wednesday.
“The health and safety of our students is a top priority, and who better a
mentor than the big guy himself?” Jerry Falwell Jr., the school’s president,
said in a statement, clarifying that approximately 4% of the student body
could be fortunate enough to meet Jesus Christ in the next few months. The
remainder of students are expected to return for the fall semester, since the
university requires their tuition payments to pay for Falwell’s shady business
dealings.
“By allowing students to remain on campus grounds, we’re not only offering
them a lesson in our version of social distancing, but also setting them up
for a one-way trip to meet the man himself. Giving our youth a once-in-a-
lifetime opportunity to meet the Son of God in Heaven is just one of many
things that makes our university unique.”
Falwell did note that attempts at meeting Jesus Christ would be considered
extracurricular work outside of the classroom; however, those who succeed
will receive an honorary doctorate in willful ignorance of basic biology."
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Responses:
[22068] [22067] |
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22068 |
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Date: March 27, 2020 at 11:16:21
From: Alan, [DNS_Address]
Subject: Re: Falwell Offers Liberty Students Chance to Meet Jesus by End of... |
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Responses:
None |
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22067 |
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Date: March 26, 2020 at 12:22:15
From: Cinnamon in Oregon, [DNS_Address]
Subject: Re: Falwell Offers Liberty Students Chance to Meet Jesus by End of... |
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What do you even say? I think you just throw up your hand and walk off, going about your business.
There's no cure for that kind of stupid.
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Responses:
None |
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Charles : Bible : Religion ] [ Main Menu ] |