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54114


Date: May 03, 2024 at 14:13:33
From: akira, [DNS_Address]
Subject: Advisors Assure Biden This Will Blow Over Once All Gazans Dead

URL: https://www.theonion.com/advisors-assure-biden-this-will-blow-over-once-all-gaza-1851452315?utm_campaign=TheOnion&utm_content=1714757563&utm_medium=SocialMarketing&utm_source=twitter


"WASHINGTON—As mounting campus protests and arrests over the Israel-
Hamas war threatened his fragile electoral coalition, advisors to President
Joe Biden assured him Friday that this would blow over once all Gazans were
dead. “Just lie low, let a few thousand more bombs drop on densely
populated areas, and you’re golden, Mr. President,” said senior
communications advisor Anita Dunn, promising the depleted Biden that in a
matter of months, there would hopefully be no one left to protest for in the
besieged Palestinian territory. “I know things might seem bleak now, sir, but
all you need to do is hold the course giving Israel billions in military aid, and
this will most likely all be a distant memory by November. After that, it’s
smooth sailing ahead. What are the activists going to be angry about then? A
bunch of rubble and mass graves?” Dunn went on to stress that with any
luck, there soon wouldn’t be any student protesters left alive, either."


Responses:
[54115] [54116]


54115


Date: May 03, 2024 at 15:20:29
From: mitra, [DNS_Address]
Subject: And the Onion blends right in with your other posts so well...(NT)


(NT)


Responses:
[54116]


54116


Date: May 04, 2024 at 04:53:08
From: akira, [DNS_Address]
Subject: yes... the wisdom of satire(NT)


(NT)


Responses:
None


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